Sleepsinging

55 pictures on the wall

A 100 chances that you blew

If only these pictures could say "I Love You"

You're on the heartbreak list

You're on the payroll 

You come with a hit and miss and gone when the lights go

You're on the heartbreak list

You're on the payroll

You're on the payroll

Coming in just under speed

When others die trying

You're winning with both broken knees

It was so beautiful what do you think

Everybody grew up and turned into asshole

Hi

This is now a trash. I've been lingering around Malaysia. Alone. That had me coughing for weeks and really toned my energy levels. I met my little brother. I spent almost 2 weeks with him, he's taller than me now :') It was really hard to pretend in front of him. Pretend that everything's gonna be okay. For him, I tried so hard to be as close to perfect. I want him to be happy, without thinking about anything that would distract him. When will I meet you again?
And, Happy New Year! 2012, I learned a lot. I succeed, I failed. To see people happy. To see people sad. Too see people excited. Too see people really feeling and showing love. It makes me who I am. Made. But I was too kind back then. Was I?
"Have I ever been angry?" I asked myself. The only thing that would come out from my mouth if there's anything is "No, it's totally fine!" "Don't worry, I completely understand!" "I'm always gonna be here if you need anything"
I realized that. My strongest yet actually the weakest point of me is that I would never get mad. I would automatically act nice, without actually realizing I'm doing it. Well I hope starting from today, God will show me the actual way to show love for His people. And now Im back in my apartment, with myself. Relaxing.

Nothing

Teribble things 

happen to 

good people 

everyday.

Consequentially

I am not

one of the 

good people.

I am one of the

teribble things 

:)

Absolutely

This is the story of a girl

Who cried a river and drowned the whole world

And while she looks so sad in photographs 

I absolutely love her

When she smiles

Now how many days in a year

She woke up with hope

But she only found tears

And I can be so insincere

Making her promises never for real

As long as she stands there waiting

Wearing the holes in the soles of her shoes

Now how many days dissapear

When you look in the mirror

So how do you choose

This is a story of a girl

Who cried a river and  in the whole world

And while she looks so sad in photographs 

I absolutely love her

When she smiles

Now how many lovers would stay

Just to put up with this shit

Day after day

Now how did we end up this way

Watching our mouths for the words that we say

As long as we stand here waiting

Wearing the clothes or the soles that we choose

Now how do we get there today

When we're walking too far for the price of our shoes

This is the story of a girl

Her pretty face she hid from the world

And while she looks so sad in photographs

I absolutely love her

Don't miss

A mother's journey, Sacramento Bee Photography

Recuerdos Inolvidables

Growing old just brings sorrow. But you have no choice. You're gonna make it someday. Lift up your eyes and see the sun is rising. Be amazing.
    2001, every evening I would go to Ibu', my Indonesian aunt's house which only took a few minutes. I would talk to her, help her in the kitchen. There was a swing tied to a tree in front of her house so we would play there sometimes. It was relaxing because the house was just a few meters away from the beach. She would tell me stories. How she missed her daughter, how things were back then. But I'm sure she's okay right now because she finally met her daughter.
     Siblings. Siblings. Hm. I have two unidentical twin brothers. 22 years old. We were perfect back then. They treated me like a princess. We played together, we watched tv together. But then, when I was 5, just in a click, everything's gone. Until now, we don't talk unless it's important. We would laugh at the same thing but no, no talking. You don't want to be me. Trust me. And I don't know why. Why? No. Echo-ing in heart.
     I was sitting outside of the house, talking to the moon. Not really. It was winter. I was playing with the smoke that came out from my mouth. Then this old man came to me and was like "You want some cake?(holding a plate full of cake)". I said no. It looks delicious but nahh he's a stranger duh. He was too drunk that he told me how he used to be happy with his wife, his kids. I don't even know what was the reason because he went silent for a while and started talking in a different language and pointing at the cars, locus and the pool. He sounded luctisonus but he didn't stop smiling I swear. He made my gloomy night tho. I hope he's happy right now.
     But sometimes, I feel like running away you know? Like.. just run.. and not turning back. I want to forget everyone, everything. Like last July, I rode the jet ski and didn't realized that I was drifting around too far. That feeling, when you just flew away, you don't care about anything, was just amazing. The only thing I could see was the red flag that the man at the beach waved at me.

Me

Yesterday : Hungry     

Today : Hungry 

Tomorrow : Hungry

Next week : Hungry

Next month : Hungry 

Apocalypse : Hungry